This response should be a minimum of ½ page and a maximum of 1 page

Areas of difficulty in responses:

1. People blurred together their own ideas and the ideas of the original writer, not properly crediting which parts were put forward by the original writer.

 

2. People summarized or gave judgments rather than responding. Think of a response as something you would do if participating in a conversation with someone where you and that other person were engaged in a mutual exploration of what something means and how it works. You would want to show that you had indeed been listening to the other person and following what they say, but you would want to contribute something also on your turn--provide a further application, question what the person meant by saying such and such, explore a possible consequence? (You would not want just to restate what they said without contributing anything yourself). Neither would you want to "pronounce" a judgment as if you were the expert and the other person an inferior. Below are examples that might help clarify the difference between a summary (just restating without contributing anything), a judgment (pronouncing), and a response (showing you’ve heard and understood, but contributing something of your own to the ongoing discussion).

Are the following "responses" or summaries?

A. Students who now attend college can be classified according to how effectively they communicate: those who can, those who sometimes can, and those who cannot. Influences in the society that cause difficulties include television.

B. Shaughnessy classifies students according to how effectively they communicate: those who can, those who sometimes can, and those who cannot. The writer goes on to explain that difficulties are caused by such influences from society as television.

C. I thought it was interesting that someone took the time to identify the fact that open-admission policies were forcing teachers into a new role, and that, as a result, teachers were having trouble adjusting their teaching to meet the needs of the incoming students. My experience in the Writing Lab confirms Shaughnessy's point that emphasis on error causes problems. The students with weak writing skills seem to have had poor experiences in high school. Those poor experiences, in turn, have made them see writing as a chore instead of a way to express themselves. Their low self-esteem when it comes to writing has resulted in their having no desire to write (and therefore little chance to improve).

Readers form an image of what the writer is like from the writing. If I am writing a response to Shaughnessy, I want a reader to think I am intelligent, observant, and not arrogant; readers who form this impression of me will be more receptive to my message. A reader is particularly sensitive to whether the writer considers herself/himself "above" other people.) Do you as a reader form an equally attractive image of Writer C and Writer D? Where does each situate herself with regard to us?

D. Writing instructors would be well served to invest a little time in reading Chapter 1 and using the ideas in it to help them instruct their BW students. The chapter is rather repetitive and overstates many of its points, but it is nonetheless helpful.

IMPROVING COHERENCE:

Draft: The major misconception that teachers have of bad spellers is that they are not intelligent. The reality is that they have not been exposed long enough to the above mentioned experiences of encountering words. Though not as fatal as some would say, there are many unpredictable spellings in English. The pronunciation of a word does not always match its counterpart on paper. There is an entire class of words that sound the same but have different meanings and spellings (homophones). Students are unfamiliar with the structure of words, and often have not built a memory of their spellings.

A reader unfamiliar with the above material would probably not know whether the sentence that begins with "the pronunciation of a word" clarifies and explains the preceding sentence or is a second major reason. Transitional words help show the groupings and relationships. If I had fewer than four major reasons, I might use also or in addition to mark that I have gone from one to another; four in additions, however, get tedious and confusing, so I numbered the major reasons. (In an essay, paragraphing helps mark where you stop explaining one thing and go on to another.)

Revision: The major misconception that teachers have of bad spellers is that they are not intelligent. The reality is that they have not been exposed long enough to the above mentioned experiences of encountering words. Though not as fatal as some would say, there are many unpredictable spellings in English. Second, The pronunciation of a word does not always match its counterpart on paper. There is, for example, an entire class of words that sound the same but have different meanings and spellings (homophones). Third, Students are unfamiliar with the structure of words, meaning that. . .[here I would explain in the rest of the sentence, then make a new sentence to show that the fourth reason is "equal in weight" to the others].